Cultivating Presence: Tips on Balancing Business and Love

In this modern world of innovation and technology, who has time for love? Most of us feel like we barely stay afloat. Our work lives are so easily transformed into endless agendas of emails, spreadsheets, deadlines, and presentations. And oddly enough, we’re told that makes us successful. But it actually makes us unhappy says Mars Blacc who’s the lead instructor at Attraction By Science which specializes in pickup bootcamps in Toronto.

That kind of breathless lifestyle is not only exhausting; it’s unnatural. Human beings are built for more than ambition. We’re meant to study, reflect, love, share, and enjoy one another. When we focus excessively on one area of life (in this case, our need to work and provide for ourselves), we neglect all the other aspects of our humanity and are consequently thrown out of balance.

Compartmentalizing these two worlds is hard, but necessary. Doing so can significantly reduce your stress levels and enable you to be more fully engaged in your life. Here are some tips on how to achieve that ideal level of balance, and thus avoid feeling restless, dissatisfied, and overwhelmed.

1) Cut ties with your phone

It’s easy to feel pressured to answered emails when you’re off the clock. However, if you want to make time for those you care about, you’re going to have to choose human contact over your inbox. Once you get off work, kill notifications attached to your business email. This will prevent distraction when you’re spending time with your significant other and enable you to become more present.

2) Being busy doesn’t equal being happy

Ever notice how being busy is equated with success? However, the reality is that having your calender crammed with busywork is hardly a recipe for long-term happiness. Actually, it’s a ticking time bomb that will only crowd your days unnecessarily and lead you to neglect your loved ones.

This is arguably one of the biggest flaws of modern work culture. We spend so much time being “busy” that we forget that our relationships require just as much work as our ambitions. We’re a society infected by a fear of silence, but unless we master the art of being still, we’re never going to feel wholly connected with ourselves or with others.

You need to cultivate this basic concept of leisure. Delete some of that busywork and put your significant other on the schedule instead. This will lead you to feeling more spiritually connected and emotionally congruent.

3) Quality time, not quantity time

Quality time is all about being present. You can’t split your time between your work schedule and your love life as if it’s some kind of mathematical formula. What’s important is to really be engaged in the time you spend with the people you love. For example, if you’ve been working for 7 hours and can only really give yourself to the person you love for 1 hour, really do it. Give them your full focus and attention. Being present will make your relationships that much more meaningful and fulfilling

Related Video